Wednesday, April 14, 2010

My brother has a problem of changing in front of his classmates when p.e.!!! what should he do???

the teacher in p.e. class told her students to change thier clothes inside the classroom every p.e. class!!!! hye is shy to show his body in front of jis classmates!!!! espescially girls!!!! he some what a silent kind of person!!!!!what should he do????

My brother has a problem of changing in front of his classmates when p.e.!!! what should he do???
Why on earth would a teacher have boys and girls changing in front of each other???????????? This is totally NOT acceptable. It is completely different if boys change in front of boys and girls in front of girls. I have NEVER heard of a school that has co-ed locker rooms. Possibly your brother has more of a problem changing in front of the girls? THIS would be understandable. I would suggest that your parents go speak with the principal if the PE teacher does in fact have a co-ed change policy. I can't imagine that most parents would agree to such a thing at such a young age. It is actually perverted on the PE teachers part. Also............ she honestly can not force your brother to comply with such a request/demand. If nothing is done about it, I'd say your brother should just protest by NOT changing and accept an "F" in the class!!! Poor fella............
Reply:He should not be pressured into pulling his pants down in front of a bunch of people, if he is shy eventually he'll grow out of it when he becomes an adult.If that was high school or college, maybe that would've been called a lewd act or a crime, right?Or what?
Reply:changing in front of students of the opposite sex is totally out of line !


He needs to get over it if he just changes in the gym dressing room.
Reply:I would ask the kid(your brother) to pretend he is front of a mirror and there are a lot of people around. If for some reason he feels that he is being watched and ridiculed, then I would let him be for now. Also, if for some reason, the teacher is requesting that all students change in the same lockerrooms, then I know this as a problem. When kids first start out in puberty they don't quite understand that their poise and demeanor(body changes) are something to be admired by others and that the peers from other opinions can create harm on their self image later on. Plus at a young vulgnerable age, they are able to know right from wrong but it becomes a question to how often they are being asked to do something that don't seem fit to them.





My son was asking this same question to me last week and as his mother, I told him do what he feels is best for him and to tell the Principal, not teacher if someone mocks him for his size, etc. and that the teacher is not correcting it properly.





If after all that and nothing seems to work, I would check school policy on the co-ed forums. I mean right now, no kid in thier right mind should change in front of their peers if not necessary,I mean if they know it is like doing total harm to themselves.


The teacher in this question, in my opinion can be acting on child-molestation and may be one of those lude perverted creeps who needs to be repremainded and fired at once if he/she sees this as their own personal sex act by a minor. The Principal should check all classes if possible to see if a child comes up with such a query. Then if there is, go to the school board and take the matter to the local authorities for further investigation.





Bet you don't recall the stories of the gym teacher who used his boy students for lude acts? That matter was resolved because the school and the authorities were on to the teacher for years. To gain substantial evidence though they had to have enough evidence with the kids and their parents as witnesses. Sad scenario yes I know, the poor kids suffered in the long run.





Remember too, for some teens it takes years into adulthood to learn that it only becomes accpeptable to change in front of their peers when you are ready to acknowledge your body parts. As any child knows, they don't quite perceive the world as that big yet. It isn't until adulthood when one journeys outside the box. I mean when one knows it is right to go about change. In this case take the leap and change in front of the other like that of married people.





Right now, all kids begin learning the right social skills to be able to be equipped with personal sanctitiy. I mean in thier lives whether social or in religious form a person has to gain self control young to be able to go over who they dress in front of, that being only themselves and no other.





As a kid, babies sometimes get bathed together because they have no idea what is going on with each other. Plus men can change in front of each other men as women do because this is what happened long ago but touching as babies is an innocent act and is not all an off-limit thing.





On the personal level at this point in time, if for some reason a boy has to say scratch his genitalia in front of another boy and the other boy touched him, well then that is crazy. Only a boy can touch his own genitals out of curiousity but letting another do so is completely out of character and is all wrong. The reason for this is because they are coming into maturity a tad.





For those who don't grasp reality, their perverted act shows one that this act is their acceptable choice and who cares if I am willing of the consequences to the action. Also a pervert who fails to see the act, is against the law.





For this case, I think the teacher is getting an arousement on watching the kids do their thing.





I had a gym teacher many moons ago who was a lady and when the girls changed she was like right on top of you. It was like she admired everyone but she always kept her distance up to an extent. She knew step out of line and she was to get an earfull. One day, she got cocky with me because I refused to take a shower. Now this was because other kids were always saying how I looked and never left me alone. Besides that, I could not deal with standing in a showerstall that had only one big wall between us. I had to tell my Principal that she was cramping my style and I could not shower with a person hovered over me and I was always made to cry. she never molested me but watching her watch me felt that way since I was at a young age and it was horrifying.





I also want to ask, did you brother ever tell you someone else touched him in a manner that was inappropriate? he can be repressing memories if so and don't want to be watched because this reminds him too much of that time when all was a tragedy.


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So the main to this is:


Q.Why in heavens name would a child be subject to change in gym both girl/boy when they see this as an uncomfortable condition to the class setup?





A. Because either they are nervous about their self-image now or becasue they think to it as being pressured by an outside party and it acts as if they are being forced into a lude act that makes it difficult for them to understand their own social status later.





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Think about it, what I say is true...We all go through this. If you know your brother has a real issue seek professional help.


Also, please use your gutt instincts and tell him that if he knows something isn't right to play dumb, watch the other boys/girls around the teacher and if he spots something wrong to do as I said and tell your parents right away and not wait. They will know what to do to help him.
Reply:they should not be told to change in front of ANYONE! someone needs to report this teacher.!!! TELL YOURE PARENTS NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reply:He has to change in front of girls?? You might want to check into this...quickly
Reply:Tell the teacher he is out of order. Everyone is entitled to privacy and shouldnt be made to feel inadequate like this.





The teacher is a bad teacher, and should be told so...
Reply:he cant be forced he has the right to privacy as all americans do and can ask to change in a stall
Reply:yyou should telll him a funnny story about you when you were a teen changing in p.e or make up one or tell him that it's a part of life and there are many boys who feel that way.=)
Reply:he should tell the teacher that he doesn't feel comfortable changing in front of the classmates
Reply:tell him to wear his gym shorts or some boxers under his reg clothes, and also he is not to be permitted to change in front of girls! sounds like you got a sicko pe coach!
Reply:Let him wear his gym clothes to school
Reply:What your bro should do is just change his clothes in front of the family. When he gets used to that have him pretend that his classmates are all of his family and it will go by mad easy for him trust me it worked for me as well. You could aslo have him put on his gym clothes under the clothes he wore to school.
Reply:The P.E. coach sounds a bit wacked. This is not proper behavior. I would approach the administration of the school and make them aware of the situation and demand that it be changed.
Reply:first of all--sit alone in your or his bedroom---if you are another boy--his brother this will do--if you are a girl then it wont---


but if you are a boy--sit down talk with him... and see whats wrong----next thing is --get him in front of a mirror--even if you have to go to nearby walmart dressing room and have him strip in front of the mirror---alot of boys are ashamed of seeing themselves naked in a mirror--so get him to do this---i know this is true as i was the same way--


get him over the fear and being ashamed of seeing himself in his underwear in front of you or in front of a mirror---this a good way to start--


if you are a girl and your brother has to use the mirror then hope he does it and sees that he is a young handsome fellow like the other boys in school and sees that there is nothing to be ashamed of---


if he doesnt conquer this then he will have harder times as he gets older from having sex since he wont let anyone see him in his underwear--he surely wont let anyone see his penis-----so this is something he needs to get over--


in all actuality--i got over my shyness when i was 13 and me and another boy played show and tell.. that really helped me out alot--seeing him and his parts assured me that i was just like other boys---


hope this helps


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